Leaving Portland, Meditating on a Train

Yesterday marked my last day in Portland for a stretch. My plane ticket for Thailand says that I'll be flying back on the 9th of September, but we'll see if that holds up with my exploring and curious nature. I'll be living in Santa Barbara for the next moth before I fly out of LAX to Bangkok.

Meagen, my partner, and Tsarra, my Portland mother blew kisses as I walked through the gate. I will truly miss Portland on so many levels. The fear and anxiety that I've had for the last couple of weeks about not wanting to go, how I'd miss my friends and family too much to enjoy life has almost vanished. I feel lighter, like I have some more gusto to explore places that I haven't been to. It's very liberating for this almost 29 year old to feel. At the same time I am battling with some really serious ideas about where I should be in the world. In society. House, wife, kids, two car garage dreams aren't even something that I need for myself anymore, and as the hours pass, I feel more clear about my decision to wander for the next nine months. Hallelujah is blaring a beautiful siren in my ears. I feel a sense of purpose in my move and even more in the power of living simply out of a back pack. Living this way, or so my experience has showed, allows me to feel my truest potential. The same clothes, same stuff, less stuff, interacting with people as my entertainment, it's all fresh. Like I get to eat fruit straight off the vine. Maybe it's just the going, moving slow from place to place. But for some reason, I feel right at home with it.

My dharma sister Sara took the train with my as far as Sacramento. It was a nice transition to have her to talk with as the train rolled away from union station. There is, for those of you unaware, a space large enough to have a sit and a few yoga poses at the back of every car. Before we both turned in, we sat in meditation at the back of the train. I found it very inspiring for me to sit in the rocky car as I lowered my gaze to the lint covered floor. I would highly recommend that if you are planning extended train travel, you do the same.

Besides the wines of spolied children late into the night, and a man with night terrors, I had an undisturbed sleep. I had a coffee substitute drink that gave me enough energy to sit in the observation car. I gazed at the California coastline and wrote. Peaceful poetry. I think I'll trail off for some sleep.

Before I do, I want to thank all those in portland who have made my life there a memorable one. I'll miss all of you, and hope to see you on the long journey onward.

***

Day after writing this:

I feel fantastic. The sun. The movement. Putting my bicycle back together. Being back at home. I feel ready to make this move. AZOO!

The Photo:

Upon leaving Paso Robles, I saw all of these great big trees. I found them inspiring, and was happy to see them still thriving around farming project that the train was moving past.